• Monique Gaddy

Resilience - The Key to Healthy Adulthood


photo of plants growing out of a crumbling stone staircase

What is Resiliency?

According to the article Resilience, by Psychology today - "Resilience is the psychological quality that allows some people to be knocked down by the adversities of life and come back at least as strong as before." What sorts of experiences count as adversities? One way to measure adversities, particularly, those that were experienced in childhood, is with the ACES test. While resilience is a quality that some of those who have experienced hardships and trauma may have acquired, others may struggle with developing the skills needed to overcome past, present, and future hardships. Luckily, with the right tools, resilience can be built!


Why is it Important?

The article - Building Your Resilience, from the American Psychological Association, states: "becoming more resilient not only helps you get through difficult circumstances, it also empowers you to grow and even improve your life along the way." Adapting well to all sorts of stressors from many sources can empower you to improve your life as well as continue to grow. Life is always throwing stressors at us, too. From workplace stress, to family dilemmas and of course, as we have seen, world wide experiences that even affect our day to day lives. While we may not be able to control what happens around us, other people, or even regular daily occurrences like changes in weather, we can help ourselves become stronger by building resilience.


It Can Be Built!

To become more resilient, forming and maintaining healthy habits will help you to take the best care of yourself. This can be done by making sure you are surrounded by healthy people, keeping up with things that help you keep your mind stable, and finding purpose in your life.


Healthy relationships. Making sure that you are connected to people who are empathetic, compassionate, and supportive can make or break anyone's day. If you have ever had experience with a toxic relationship - whether it has been your significant other, your parent, your child, or even a coworker - you know that once healthy boundaries have been set, it can be so much easier to focus on yourself and your goals. Not everyone knows what a healthy relationship looks like, and some have gone a long time without seeing one modeled or without having the right people around. If you think you may need guidance in understanding what makes a healthy relationship, there is a lot to learn online or through researching different books. There are also numerous therapy groups, community organizations, and therapists who can help you figure out what makes a good relationship and how to keep those compassionate, healthy people around you.


picture of a plant growing out of sand

Making your mind strong. All of our minds can become cluttered, especially when stressed out. Since there are so many different things that can stress us out, and our bodies are impacted by these stressors, one key way to reducing anxiety, fear, and panic is to practice mindfulness. There are different ways you can be mindful, but I prefer meditation and journaling. Both of these methods help me to work through different stressful situations, and I love both because I can do them on my own and I don't have to involve other people who may be dealing with their own problems as well. What are some ways that you try to keep your mind strong?


Finding your purpose. Some people have large dreams and huge goals that they want to accomplish in life, others are just happy being a part of a family or a thriving community. Some people have talents and gifts to give to the whole world, and others bring most of these talents to their families or local neighborhoods. Whether you have grand dreams or want to live a simple, peaceful life, finding your purpose can add a fuel to your day and life that is hard to let go of once it's apparent. I know for me, once I realized my purpose in life, I felt the weight of the world melt and the pressure and stress of self-importance vanished. I became happier and lighter, living each day with a unique intent that I never seem to get tired of or find in short demand. Living each day with a purpose in mind will help you build resilience along the way!


Book on Resilience:

book cover for Resilience by Steven M. Southwick










book cover for Resilience by Andrew Zolli










book cover for Resilience by Frederic Flach, M.D.










book cover for Habit Changers by M.J. Ryan

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